Outcome dependency, when is part of your mindset is a killer blow for your game. For ANY level.
When you start off fresh, new and wet behind the ears, just talking to new people gets you your kick but as you go futher down the road, you start thinking “When will I get laid?” and so you and now determined to persist and open more, some you may not even really like just to see if you can get the notch.
A good part of game is about “Vibe” (Which is why I focus a lot on innergame in my teaching) Now if you have got the vibe off NEEDING her number, do you think you are really coming across as a strong minded, confident guy with a bulletproof identity? No!!!
The aim for you is really not to NEED that validation off of woman, that hit of adrenalin when you get a number an instant date or club makeout. But instead to become internally referenced where you are content on whether you get 10 numbers, 1 or none. Simply recognise that you can and that we all have different days
This is problem that I came about again recently when filming some infields for an upcoming project. I met up with my camera guy and felt that I was putting an act, going for the number even if the girl was boring as fuck. This was horrible for my vibe and made all approaches I made that day seem very in authentic and not genuine. And women can sense this
So how do we overcome this?
– Be genuine & authentic. Watching someone who approach a girl who he really desires and watching the same guy approach a girl just to get his practice in is an order of magnitude much better
– Have fun when out and don’t only focus on ladies. If you are with a wing who you can have fun with as well as chasing skirt. do! The best times I have are when I’m with my wing laughing intensely down the street or when I’m by myself reading a book in a coffee shop and an opportunity arises. It’s because i’m not 100% focused on ladies.
-Enjoy rejection. I love rejection, I find it humbling and makes the sweet so much sweeter. You can never enjoy and have fun talking to women if you fear it. it will happen, just accept it
-Don’t compare yourself to others and there results. They are different, have different strengths and weaknesses. Rather than be down about it, think, what can I do to improve?